Happy New Year! Emotional regulation in 2021.
It was a quiet winter holiday. There were no parties, no big family gatherings, or holiday shopping trips to the mall. While that isn’t what we’re normally used, I found the holidays peaceful, restful, and intimate. And I hear I’m not the only one that felt that way! This break I reconnected with one of my old friends who is now a yoga instructor and thai massage therapist (check her out here!). Over an hour long walk outside, we caught up on the past 5 years and she shared some learnings from her practice today: this year her clients experienced a meaningful improvement in their immune system. The reduced social, commute, and travel calendar has allowed many bodies to slow down.
Going into 2021, I reflected on how I can bring more serenity into my life. It goes back to focusing on what truly matters and how you can be content. Mine are investing in my health (body, mental) and my relationships, and practising meditation to train my mind to be present. Oftentimes unease or unhappiness is from an endless chatter inside our minds. In 2020 it was like we added rocket fuel to these thoughts with the chaos from a world-stopping virus (LITERALLY) and media outlets that are seemingly full of sad, hateful, or angry news. It’s easy to get swallowed up in all that heightened energy, but we must remain hopeful. We must be optimistic. We must strive to see the positive. On that note, I’d recommend reading WSJ’s interview with Ethan Kross, an experimental psychologist and neuroscientist who specializes in emotion regulation. I particularly liked his commentary on “awe” and how it can help us control our negative thoughts.
We experience awe when we are in the presence of something vast that we have trouble explaining. Some people get it from religious experiences. Others from looking at the sky or an incredible piece of art or by attending an amazing concert. When we experience chatter we are narrowly focused on our problems. Experiencing awe shows us how much broader the universe is. And that puts things into perspective pretty significantly.
On that note, I’m going to end with gratitude. I have a job at a company with an inspiring mission (economic empowerment), work with a fantastic team, and have been able to spend more time with my family than I normally would. Looking outside my window and seeing the snow fall on the sleepy suburban homes around mine, I’m feeling pretty content.
